Obsessed.

Okay I am mad now. All I think about EVERY day is about going home to watch videos and whatever, on my korean stuff. Am I mad? Yes.

We Got Married, Brown Eyed Girls. They are NEVER not on my mind. Read this phrase carefully: NOT on my mind.

Anyway, back to reality.. I think I really need to get them off my mind, or my A'levels are a goner. The reason why I resisted the Kwave so much back in secondary school was because I knew I would NEVER study (and get past O's) if I got obsessed. Then now, oh great, I THOUGHT I wouldn't get obsessed so I tried, and turned out I became worse than obsessed -- I'm addicted. I don't even have the patience to hang around facebook anymore. And I don't wanna use MSN (esp. since it kena-ed some virus). And blogging... Wah I'm only blogging now cause today I was out the whole day, so I got some time to think through things a little. This is bad..

But, what I thought of? Ah, can I put all in point form?

- I realized I'm quite a jealous person. I didn't even realize it myself, but after putting bits and pieces of my thoughts and behaviour from past to present together, I realized that. You know why they always say "When someone dislikes you, it's cause they're jealous of you."? Haha I kind of find some truth in that.. Yep.

- I seek approval a lot. I've always wanted to be someone who's independent and has her own individual thinking, but.. I seek the views and opinions of other people too much. Not as in I literally ask them, but I yearn for their opinions to approve of me. So yeah, I always end up doing stuff which people want me to do, not what I myself want to do. Which sucks.. I wanna change this, but I can't imagine doing something which people don't think I should do. The thought of it tortures me. I'm like the kid in dramas who always seeks the attention and approval of all the adults. Lol that's me.

- I am a slacker, and I am trying to change.

- I am too nice at inappropriate moments.

Okay, this post is getting draggy. My mind is already wandering off........ ):
Bye!