Stigma

Sunday night:
I was blow-drying my hair today. My mom offers to do it for me, so I let her. She just arrived back in Singapore in the afternoon, and she's tired. She patiently does it layer by layer, cause she understands how frustrated I get by those random strands which stick up. But me, I watch the minute hand of the clock on the wall pass the 45 mark. Then 50. 55. 0. I panic. Tomorrow's the start of my promotional examinations, and I have to go study. I NEED to study. Finally I say, "不用那么直的啦!" Then she explains with a gentle tone, "没有,这样弄才可以--" and before she can even finish her sentence she's interrupted: "我已经没有时间了!", I blurt out rashly. Silence. Tense and awkward atmosphere. The guilt creeps into me. My mom's not young anymore, how much more time does she even have? And she's willing to spend it doing MY hair for me. And me? I have a long journey ahead and plenty of time, but this time is reserved for friends, CCA, and now studies. And I start wondering, ....even if one day I excel in my studies, or be it in life, will she still be there to see it?
Most importantly, will I be filled with regrets, if she isn't.



//Kk end of that post. Hahaha. Had GP paper yesterday, econs CS today. Won't talk about them cause I don't wanna wallow over previous mistakes alrd. Yay! Chem 2, math, ELL, chem 1 and econs essay left. Hope is still around, waiting for me to GRAB it. I shall go sleep now, I needa fight my battle tomorrow! (Victory has already been promised and confirmed but stilll, fighting with faith gives it an extra something ;ppp) Yup, I shall stay rooted in God so that winds and typhoons and tornadoes and tsunamis and volcanic eruptions are unable to move me and all just become peanuts and easy-peasy....... Wait, what are those again? Haha too insignificant to remember alrd. Tsk. Goodnight! One more week. ((: